life is boring without u~

2010-06-15T10:32:00.001-07:00

2010-06-15T10:08:00.000-07:00

THESE PHOTOS CONTAIN OUR SWEETEST MEMORIES
WHICH I SHALL NEVER FORGET FOR MY LIFE
FOR I STILL LOVE YOU TILL NOW

2010-06-14T02:55:00.000-07:00

you msg me ytd and i just cant let you go..
was trying my best to forget you..
you 1 msg from you brings up the memories from the past..
tell me what should i so??
i really miss you hell lots!!
and i still love you!!

2010-06-01T09:33:00.000-07:00

what must i do so that i can fully let you go??
babe don't you know you're still on my mind all this while?
i don't know what to say..
just that this feeling sucks!!

2010-04-28T06:10:00.000-07:00

2010-04-27T20:13:00.000-07:00

asd.. u jealous isit?
go get a life.. instead at here toking crap..
so no life sia you..
felt pity for you..

2010-04-25T01:02:00.000-07:00

these few days have been realli busy..
work n study..
and i slept 12 hrs straight todae =3

2010-04-18T05:38:00.001-07:00

2010-04-18T03:55:00.000-07:00

alright.. back home..
work at capella jus now with indra n chin cher..
so tired..
hidden host on sat, capella on sun..
but was worth la..
hidden host learn alot of stuff.. =)
so tired..
now the dark clouds are coming..
going to rain v heavily..
are you thinking of me??

2010-04-16T20:22:00.000-07:00

sleeping till now.. going to hidden host for work there..
it shall be my attachment working place..
hope to learn alot of things there..
excited..
and my ZHU DARLING is still sleeping..
i love you <3
sahll update when i come back at night..
tml working at capella at sentosa..
7am mus reach harbour front LOL!!
tired zz

2010-04-13T08:22:00.000-07:00

wad is the worse thing that can happen?
a hand phone break down..
sibei sian..
thinking of getting new handphones..
tml meeting Hidden Host the Chef..
hope can get in for attachment =)
and bee.. i will walk down this road with you.. not holding hands anymore..
but carrying you in my embrace and walk together <3
qing ai de i love you <3

2010-04-12T06:55:00.001-07:00

mayb i should start being more mature.. in terms of relationship..
too childish and its not the way..
dnt get emo too easily..
be more positive..
all will be better in times to come..
jiayous!!

2010-04-12T04:33:00.000-07:00

school started todae..
nth much actually..
weather is just so unbearable
gonna start trying out the menu this thur/fri
wed going Hidden Host to talk bout the IA
LOL!!
now my feelings is v mixed up..
with what my bee has told me..
something gonna happen =x
SHARKS!!

2010-04-09T20:28:00.000-07:00

ytd was nothing much at all..
went for hair cut with andrea, wilson, gavin..
but b4 that went to newbie there to buy cpl tee..
pick the design but couldnt figure the size for my bee
having a hard time choosing the size..
dnt know is to choose S or M
LOL!! then the sales girl hlp me choose..
haha n say cn change within 7 day.. X)
then 4+ go home already..
bath n change..
meet bee at bugis at 6.30..
went to buy her hamster food..
bugis > bedok > eat > bus > bedok > bus > orchard
during the bus ride to orchard..
i found out that i have love you even more..
hope that next week u are free.. if u remember it =)
bee i love you..
and may our love never ends <3

2010-04-07T07:39:00.000-07:00

actually todae suppose to rot at home..
but ard 3 andrea sms me wanna go sing K?
meet them at chai chee CC..
sing with andrea, sandy, wei jie (andrea friend), sheng wei..
had a LMAO time with them..
go ard 7+
met mum at TM the to have dinner..
then bused home..
nth much actually..
ya plus got the card from andrea (^.^)
on9 with bee..
bee dnt be mistaken..
i love you one and only..
nvr did my heart waver once when i'm with you..
cos i noe you are my everything..
i truly love you girl..
and i will never cheat on you..
these are my words for you..
and God will see it..
i love you girl <3

2010-04-04T10:33:00.000-07:00

hmm.. recently its been raining n raining..
makes me reminds of u so much..
i realli wan to meet you~
todae quite alot of people..
so tired..
hmm..
hope she wont have any sudden change in her schedule..
friday meeting her.. (Y)
i love you SHA ZHU!!!

2010-03-31T07:14:00.000-07:00

todae is dateline for EC..
call from andrea then notice need to hand up..
rush to yi ren hse to finish up..
then went home then go tp meet andrea, deyao, sam, syafiq, ammierul, jon n mdm
sir edwin join ltr..
hope u win the prelim amie bro =) we noe u can do it..
after that bused back bedok inter..
had dinner with sam n de yao..
home and not long after that..
mood swing came..
probably the worst i have..
i'm sorry bee..
i realli need you.. come hug me quick!!
shity feeling.. wtf??
hoppe to meet bee soon..
realli damn miss her!!!
idk wad to say..
my life is nothing without u..
dnt u noe how impt u are in my heart?
i realli wan u to hug me..
i v miss you.. and i love you!! <3
ZHU BABY MEET UP SOON!!
mood swing just cnt seem to go away.. ='(
AHHHH!!!
BEE I WAN YOU!!

2010-03-30T04:46:00.000-07:00

FUCK THE PERSON WHO TRIES TO DO ANYTHING TO MY GIRL
I SWEAR TO WHO EVER THE PERSON
IF I SAW U IN PUBLIC
YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GO OFF SO EASILY
PLEASE GET A LIFE.. IF YOU DO NOT HAVE 1..
YA SO JUST FUCK OFF FAR AWAY FROM MY GIRL..
YOU FUCKER _l_!!

2010-03-30T03:59:00.000-07:00

holi is gonna end soon..
schools going to start on 12 april..
seriously need to buck up..
if i'm realli need to score well for my studies..
hais..
sometimes people need to face up to reality..
i just cant bring myself to it..
anyway..
jus some rubbish post..
byes guys~

2010-03-27T10:04:00.000-07:00

Ytd spent with bee was fun.. jus that its too short..
had a fun n nice day out with her..
hope to meet soon again..
next stop east coast!!
keke.. i love you!!
recently nth much to post..
other than coming back from chalet..
nth much already (except ytd =3)
heading the bed now!! so tired!! *yawn*
nites guys!!
and i miss you too bee!! <3

2010-03-23T08:55:00.000-07:00

tired out from chalet..
guess i'll be hitting the bed soon..
chalet was fun after all..
although did nt get much sleep, and drunk on the first night =/
now back home..
too tired..
sleepy as was toking to bee on the phone..
dnt noe wad was going on my mind..
i realli wish that i could meet bee this coming fri..
its been so long since i last saw you le..
i realli love you..
and u say that i have change..
was wonder why..
i realli dnt wan to see you so tired just to meet me..
health is more impt than anything..
bee.. i realli love you!! dnt wish to see you so tired out..
it just hurts my heart if you do so..
bee try to understand me can??
i realli love you more than anything else..

2010-03-20T09:22:00.000-07:00

todae did have fun..
went out with cell group..
went soccer in the morning..
then rush home n went out the meet them at vivo..
reach and had lunch..
then it was still raining quite heavily..
then head back to Katong Chinese Swimming Complex for bowl..
cnt get in..
then went to east coast there de bowl..
had fun bt was quite noob lo =(
after which then head to the beach for games..
realli have lots of fun..
bt the amount of fun cnt take off then sadness that is in my heart..
went home ard 7..
reach home and bath then went down to work..
start at 8..
lol was cos its quite late already..
then somemore my leg is aching from all the walking n running today..
home ard 12..

now all i can think was you..
was realli angry with wad you have done to me..
though of giving it up sometimes..
i sometimes dnt realli know wad u realli wan..
i'm trying to be my best to fit your perfect guy..
i have been trying.. trying realli hard..
i'm starting to get tired already..
at a loss of wad to do also..
but wad is past is past le..
so lets jus forget bout it and move on ok?
bee i love you v much!!
and i cnt lose you!!
hope this fri we can meet..
now having holi..
mon and tues chalet.. wed go skool..
fri meet bee (hope so)
i jus wish that my holi is spent with you..
i love you ♥♥!!

2010-03-17T03:33:00.001-07:00

bee..
i know it's been a while since i last saw you already..
i hope this friday u are free..
hope we can meet up for a dinner or something..
i realli wan to hold you in my arms again..
i realli miss you..

那一扇车门关出我们的裂痕
一声就震断了回头的路程
爱无法均分以后就留给你们
也许用伤害结束爱才更动人
容忍的人其实并不笨只是另可对自己残忍
竟然爱不能恒温祝福就留给你下一个人
你是好人也是个坏人
对我坦承只为了朝他狂奔
不能放任所一放了
这点痛我还能忍
我是好人也是个坏人
分的够狠你才有借口转身
令原爱一点不剩
也不忍看恋人爱成路人

容忍的人其实并不笨只是令可对自己残忍
竟然爱不能恒温祝福就留给你下一个人
你是好人也是个坏人
对我坦承只为了朝他狂奔
不能放任所一放了
这点痛我还能忍
我是好人也是个坏人
分的够狠你才有借口转身
令原爱一点不剩
也不忍看恋人爱成路人
三个人重不对等终有个人必须牺牲
那永恒就等他带你完成

你是好人也是个坏人
对我坦承只为了朝他狂奔
不能放任所一放了
这点痛我还能忍
我是好人也是个坏人
分的够狠你才有借口转身
令原爱一点不剩
也不忍看恋人爱成路人
令原爱一点不剩
也不忍看恋人爱成路人

2010-03-16T01:37:00.000-07:00

today has been totally rotting at home..
and its 1 month bee and counting..
i love you..
although i cnt meet you todae..
bt u will always b in my heart..
no matter wad happen to us..
i will still hold on this r/s..
cos i love you very much!! <33
missing you!!

2010-03-15T02:54:00.000-07:00

its jus seem so hard not to msg you..
i want to hold you in my arms once again..
bee..
hope you cool down le msg me alright?
i damn miss you!!
and this song is for you..

2010-03-14T09:56:00.000-07:00

dnt even know wad to blog..
haiz..
all i could think now is you..
i miss you v much..
my love for you is realli deep..
deeper than wad you could think..
couldnt stop thinking bout you..

2010-03-13T07:18:00.000-08:00

hais..
dnt even know wad to blog somemore..
morning went for soccer training..
back at home at1..
had lunch and rest..
woke up then went for work..
work n call bee..
chatted for awhile..
work till 10..
went off home..

dnt noe wad's happening to me..
kinda moody now adays..
hais..
jus wish to say that..
hope our r/s could stay on..
i love you and cnt let you go..
i seriously need you..
i'm missing you every moments..
wish to see ur smiles again..
bee i love you..

3 more days..

2010-03-12T08:42:00.000-08:00

todae cnt meet bee..
she still feeling sick..
well health come first ok?
take care my girl..

"some one doesnt deserve you at your worse, doesnt deserve you at your best"
words from my bro.. has a v deep meaning behind it..
shall engrave it in my head..
love is see-ing the perfect of an imperfect person.. doesnt it??

i wish i could just see ur smiles and hear ur laughter.
dnt you noe how much i'm missing you?
dnt you noe how much i love you more everyday?
and do you noe wad day tues is?
have you forgotten clean bout it??
but deep in my heart.. i always rem the day..
finally we have came to a month..
hope we can still walk together down the roads..
its ok since you are busy..
for i noe there's 1 day where you'll free and able to meet me..
i'll wait for you.. no matter how long i have to wait,
for my heart is already with you..
i love you!!

2010-03-10T01:57:00.000-08:00

hmm..
back from chalet, clebrating YD bdae =)
happy 18 bro =)
sick since the start of week..
same with bee too..
hope bee get well soon..
nothing much till todae..
presentation on tues was v smooth..
hope to score well for IFB.
Bee.. hope to see you real soon..
dnt you noe how much i miss you..
i love you <3

2010-03-04T06:48:00.000-08:00

todae was tiring..
waking up early in morning, working at nite..
luckily tml there's no skool..
morning bee msg me..
something happen..
and i could not be there for her when she need it =(
skool was ok..
jus that todae the weather..
home..
then change out..
bath 2 times as the weather too bloody hot..
weent to work..
msg bee too..
ended work..
maybe she asleep?
couldnt reply or ans my call..
nvm she having a hard n tiring day too..
sweetest dreams you may have =)
love you lots <3

2010-03-03T06:23:00.000-08:00

jus wanted to say..
i have no regrets in knowing you..
cos you were the one that change my life..
my everything..
wish to say this..
i love you girl<3

2010-03-02T05:16:00.000-08:00

todae went to skool for photo taking..
went home ard 11?
bounce back to bedok..
home for lunch then meet cy, yd, jayson, samuel, kj, n gen.
play from 1+ till 7+
play n had some fall..
some minor scratches..
nth much..
strain my left ankle agn.. my old injury acting up le =(
play n play non-stop..
had prata at near by indian stall..
after that cabbed back home..
v tired for my legs..
hahas..
reach home and on9 with baby..
there is always things in my heart..
i dnt wan to say..
as i'm afraid it would ruin our feelings..
i love you baby<3

2010-03-01T05:07:00.001-08:00

hmm..
todae woke up at 6..
msg bi to wake up..
then meet andrea at kembangan..
went off together..
reach skool..
had PE..
jog skool 2 rnds.. was v tiring..
no stamina too..
realli need buck up..
baby msg me by then..
late again..
baby mus take care eh..
chatted with her on the phone for awhile..
then play table tennis till 11..
cool down and went off ard 12?
reach home then had lunch..
rested then meet syafiq for proj..
finish up powerpoint..
all left is report..
finally wine project is coming to an end le =)
missing baby rite now..
hope she alright on the way back home too =)
i love you girl~<3

2010-02-27T22:17:00.000-08:00

haiz..
woke up at 1.30 as baby msg me..
glad she reach home..
talk awhile b4 going back to bed..
woke up at 6.30 again..
change n went down to work..
as i work i realise that i'm having mood swing..
felt lyk wanting to vent out my anger..
that i have contain all this while..
dnt noe why...
i jus hope that i'll be realli fine..
i need you girl..
now temperately is not in a very good..
having mood swing..
mentally and physical tired out..
working all day.. mayb at nite ltr..
all i did was jus to improve on our r/s..
work n work..
earn money to buy things.. the things you like..
so that you can go out happily with me..
feel lyk sleeping by my baby side..
have a good rest..
i need you by my side girl..
shall post more later..
depends on my mood..
but for you girl..
no matter how tired i'm..
i always try my best to put a smile on my face..
so that you wont be that worry bout me..
i love you girl~<3

alright..
came home from work..
msg baby n waiting for her to finish bathing..
tired out todae..
mayb after calling her i go straight to slp??
tml pe.. damn sian la..
baby i miss you <3

2010-02-27T06:27:00.001-08:00

post bout todae..
hmm..
as usual sleep-massage-call baby..
till she went reach orchard..
then i found i couldnt go back to sleep..
use com then wait for time to pass..
meet at andrea hse with gavin..
then bused down to katong SC for meet up with cell group friends..
went to zoe hse..
was realli fun as we play the tweet tweet tweet diu diu diu game..
had lots of fun together..
after that had a sing session..
soon then i notice it was 4.15..
faster rush out to get bus..
then change to bus 14..
then reach till katong SC..
change to cab..
$$ FLY~ T.T
msg baby along the way back home..
bath and changed then went down to work..
todae was quite bored and tired..
as there is nt much ppl..
go home ard 10..
waiting for baby to call, or even reply my msg..
started to worried bout her..
mayb she's busy??
image start to flow to my head..
started to get realli worried bout her..
usually end work ard 6??
mayb she's doing OT??
haiz..
baby faster reply my msg alright..
so that i noe you are safe n sound..
although i'm tired out..
having back ache all over..
still waiting for baby reply me =(
baby i very worried bout you.. t.T
I MISS YOU~<3

2010-02-26T08:09:00.000-08:00

There's no skool todae..
slp for quite a long time..
slp-message-call baby..
meet her for dinner..
after that slack at home till 7..
left house n meet her at lavender..
on bus dnt noe go where eat..
convince her to go my god-mum there for dinner..
bus to bedok my god-mum there for dinner..
eaten stingray, veg, satay n chix wing..
seen my mum also..
after that sweet-talking nearby..
bused to inter..
time files as she have to reach orchard at 10.30..
decided to take MRT as bus took longer time..
so tired..
nearly fall asleep while in train with baby..
send her to orchard.. after which i go back..
soon baby call me..
was realli happy that she called..
could see that she is worried bout me
i love you girl~
almost fall asleep while standing..
then vomit in toilet after alighting..
dnt noe what is happening to my body..
but baby dnt worry.. i can take care of my self..
wad i worried is baby...
so tired.. her panda eyes so thick..
she seem v tired...
could see her almost fall asleep anyhow..
baby i'm sorry =(
i hope baby can take care of herself..
hope to meet her again soon..
hope baby could have the sweetest dreams todae<3
i love you baby<3
see you in your dreams <3

2010-02-25T07:02:00.000-08:00

wonder wad has been eating me lately??
kinda mood swing for no reasons..
sad thing is that cnt meet baby tml..
a mixture of dissappointment in it too..
haiz.. why am i feeling so shyt neh?
i dnt noe wad am i suppose to do..
puting my absolute trust and faith into this relationship..
i didnt mean in anyways..
cos we only meet up once a week..
so i would cherish the time we had together..
even if it's jus a simple dinner..
i would be contented also..
anyway...
currently my mood is..
down, sad, moody, dissappointment..
i wont dare to raise my feelings to you..
as i know it would disrupt our relationship..
i rather tone it down..
all alone by myself..
i wish someone out there..
would understand the same feeling as me..
i also start to need to reflect on my self..
how to let u have your own personal space..
mayb its my childishness and selfishness..
that is making me lyk that??
maby i'm squeezing u too tight, making u hard to breath?
i realli need to reflect.. and take it into action..
or else i know this relationship would end in my hands..
all by my own hands..
i'm confused.. with tears on my cheeks again..
haiz.. better start changing le..
so..
baby.. i love you and nothing else..
cos u are the lights in my life..
i wish to delicate this song to you..
Wait For You..

2010-02-24T03:44:00.001-08:00

THIS SONG IS SO SO NICE<3 I LOVE IT~
Baby.. i wanted to tell you..
how important you are in my life..
and i cherish the times we had together..
baby i love you<3

2010-02-23T07:41:00.000-08:00

hmm.. baby's having mood swing again..
hope the period could be over as soon as possible..
dw bout me..
i'm not angry bout anything..
i wanna jus tell you that..
i love you..

2010-02-22T05:56:00.000-08:00

todae woke up at 5.30..
meet up with andrea..
he is late again..
go off with gavin..
then go skool SW..
sweat alot.. LOL
then fund raising..
sold popcorn chix, potato samosa..
then briefing..
had shortage again.. this time $4..
then wait for andrea and chincher..
went to andrea mum de salon to have my hair dye black..
i had to dye black cos of u BASTARD!!
trim trim..
went off ard 7+
had dinner..
then went off home..
damn tired..

i realli hope that baby mood swing would be over soon alright?
cos i wan to have that cheerful baby back to me again =)
baby i miss you eh <3
i love you<3

2010-02-22T05:45:00.000-08:00

i been reflecting..
to my self...
how could i be a better person..
wad andrea to to me..
has left me deep in my hearts..
perhaps a change in me?

and to my baby..
no matter wad happens..
i'll be by your side no matter wad..
cos i need you girl in my life...
i cnt afford to lose you in anyways..
i love you alot..
and i promise you..
we will last long <3

2010-02-21T07:54:00.000-08:00

hmm..
start from this morning..
went to work ard 9.. ended ard 1..
went home n change out n went to meet andrea, zhao hui and de yao..
meet them at church there..
was realli fun..
maybe going church??
then after that head to havelock road there the hotel..
first was speech..
dry bt interesting..
then follow by a pre-dinner reception..
then follow by LO HEI dinner..
was nice.. food was good..
had games interval..
won $10 NTUC voucher..
cab home with andrea..
had a little heart chat with him..
reach home..
hmm.. baby seems to have a little of mood swing..
nvm jus qian qiu ta yi xia <3
baby i miss u uh<3
i love you~<3

2010-02-20T09:08:00.000-08:00

hmm..
tired out from soccer training this morning..
strain my ankle agn.. tsktsk
after that reach home..
bath n lunch..
was so tired that i fall asleep without knowing it..
then woke up at 5..
prepare n go work..
work till 11..
msg baby while working..
then faster went home to on9 with her..

i dnt noe wad is happening to me..
i just could feel tears running down agn..
i dnt noe how to describe the feelings..
jus wanted to say i'm the willing party..
holding on to the wristband n could only look at it..
as i think of you my girl..
however..
i'm going to preserve those memories of ours..
vividly n beautifully store it in my memories..
never allow it to be stained no matter what..
i jus wanna tell u my girl..
I LOVE YOU<3

2010-02-19T01:20:00.000-08:00

haiz..
todae is realli damn suay day for me in skool..
hmm..
hope that ltr meet up baby all will be fine..
i'm starting to miss baby already!! =(
shall post more when i come back ltr on =)

came back form movie baby~
she is so so sweet <3 catch DA BING XIAO JIANG..
nt bad.. kinda sad at the end when jackie chan die..
baby fall asleep walfway through the movie.. didnt noe she so tired n still make her go out with me >,<
sorry uh baby..
after that went to but wrist band..
she choose purple (miracle) n i choose white (pure)
so we mix to tgt..
gonna kip it with me all along..
after that went aimlessly ard orchard..
then ard 10.30 she gtg.. was abit sad as time fly so fast..
she go home, while i went to have a light supper..
then i reach home..
currently waiting for my baby to reach home and giv me a msg..
baby faster reach home.. I MISS YOU!!
i hope to have this kind of outing with u baby..
u just make my day~
i'll miss you.. bt I LOVE YOU even MORE!!!
hope we cn meet up again soon my baby <33
I LOVE YOU~!!

2010-02-18T03:10:00.001-08:00

alright..
todae's a tiring dae for me.. X,X
i'm so tired.. OMG!!
went skool for IFB, then watch video..
then sell food, charpad's pie n prata hotdog..
dnt noe wad's the profit..
manage to sell well =)
was glad..
tml outing cancel.. oh well..
gonna go out on movies with my baby..
cnt wait for her tml..
currently is waiting for her to go home n msg,
while i do my wine proj..
i miss you baby..
hurry up n on9 alrights?
cos i'm missing you v much <3

2010-02-16T22:49:00.000-08:00

ytd did not sleep well..
cos thinking of baby n bout our relationship..
n of course my old injury hurts as well..
todae did fund raising..
wasnt feeling v well..
having running nose n headache..
went to see doc after skool..
reach home n decided to take a rest..

woke up after nap..
tired still..
had dinner..
then stone at comp whole waiting for baby yo on9..
n yes she finally accept me..
BABY I LOVE YOU<3
i will treasure everything i have with you<3

2010-02-16T07:57:00.000-08:00

tml skool starting..
hope cn release early..
something happen jus now..
and it all lies in me..
i was wondering..
am i being too childish..
i'm trying to change in everyway..
to meet up to ur perfect expectation..
i noe wad i did was very wrong..
i noe that u still hate me..
i would let u hit n scold me..
even if jus a tiny bit or ur anger n hate for me would go away..
i have no regrets in knowing you..
cos its u who change my life..
cos its u that add colours to my life
cos its u that makes me giv up my life for u..
i have never found anybody so wonderful as you..
cos u are special..
special to me only girl..
i love u more than anything else in this world..
i wish that we could be together lyk how we used to be..
i hope that this love of ours will never change..
no matter the obstacle comes right to us
i still love you evon<3
1 and only you <3

2010-02-11T08:19:00.000-08:00

i wonder wad have i done wrong?
am i being too childish?
i jus noe that i need u more than anything else in my life..
without u i'm nothing..
i jus love you

2010-02-08T05:29:00.000-08:00

hais..
didnt get in for the competition..
sorry to those who have pin hopes on me..
anyway..
currently going through some down turn..
very fuck up with my friends..
1 word.. SUCKS~!!

2010-01-19T04:20:00.000-08:00

todae didnt went as smooth at all..
main course did lyk ......
cn be improve.. too plain..
hais..
confidence dropping fast..
shit man!!
i wan my shape back~!!

2010-01-13T01:37:00.000-08:00

was tired out by the practicing these few days..
fund raising was good..
sales was very good..
the dates for selection are drawing near..
gonna train my speed in terms of dropping..
my standard are not there anymore =(((
tml gonna to 4 appetizer, 2 creame brulee.
hope i can do it within 1-2 hours..
gonna pull up my speed..
tml buying ingredients..
so so broke this week..

all i can do now is just to keep my feelings to myself..
the way i think mayb is different from yours??
so gonna get distracted easily this few days..
all i can do is just to kip hanging on..

2010-01-11T01:26:00.000-08:00

IT SUCKS SUCKS SUCKS!!
hate it.. TOTALLY!!
i thinking i'm childish.. nt even mature enough to handle such a small thing..
mayb now's bt realli the rite time to go into a r/s..
friends shall it be..
i'm fine with it.. as long i can be with you..
but then come to think again..
r/s doesnt seem good for me at this point of time..

2010-01-10T08:14:00.000-08:00

hais.. skool starting in a few hrs time..
yet i'm bright awake..
gonna have tough times this week..
practice n practice for asian n world skills..
need money to buy ingredient..
having mixed feeling at this time..
not sure if wanted to get selected or not..
suckish feeling =(

over the weekends..
there wasnt much msg from u to me..
yes u saw them, yet u did not reply..
was wondering wad were u thinking..
all i can say is..
i miss you very much..
just 1 reply from u n i'll be v happy...

2010-01-08T08:17:00.001-08:00

this pic above is the dishes that is done by me n my teacher on thur.
creame brulee failed.. so no pic =P

2010-01-07T05:56:00.000-08:00

todae went skool for lessons as normal.
after that jiu prepare my self for doing the appertizer n creame brulee.
creame brulee failed..
seriously need to touch up..
then did the appetizer..
first attempt was a failure..
2nd round, with mdm help..
was facinated by the way she handle the food.
its shows that i have alot to learn.
2nd attempt turn out great..
n yes tml there is no skool..
shall have whole day of thinking up recipes..
tml is the submission date..
rite now.. i'm so hungry as i havent eaten whole day since breakfast.. =x

i have moved on..
bt then u came n tok to me..
n the way u treating me rite now.. i dnt want it to stop.
u tok to me.. makes me shy to even look back..
the feelings was back again..
couldnt stop missing you..

2009-12-29T10:57:00.000-08:00

moved on..
past is past..
no use clinging on to it..
move on.. a better tomorrow awaits =)
hahas..
have been working for past few weeks..
wad i work = wad i spent..
LOL..
bt in the end saving for itouch..
iphone or itouch?? cnt decide...
with my mp4 stolen..
no music = no life..
music just rocks up my life..
skool starting soon..
was chosen for Asian / World skill..
super happy when i recieve the msg..
will make full use of the chance..
FHA is coming in April..
mayb colide??
anyway..
skool lesson is getting SO boring as it is theory all along..
gonna b v dry =(
I WAN PRACTICAL~
miss working with my group 2..
funny idea.. new dishes..
but best of all.. TEAMWORK..
hahas..

2009 is gonna past in a few more days time..
this yr i shall say it's a pretty fast??
too busy with skool n work..
didnt have much time for myself..
anyway.. 2010.. i hope it's gonna b better for me..
wanting to change myself to..
a better person than now.. =)
my dreams.. i'm gonna reach for it..
i'm sure someday.. i'll reach it~

2009-12-22T22:31:00.000-08:00

result was out..
n i gt 3.3 for my GPA this semester..
was nt realli happy bout it.. cos i thought i could at least gt 3.5..
hais.. guess i realli need to put in alot of effort..

could only tired out my self nw..
jus to stop think of you..
wish i could jus slp away~

2009-12-16T22:44:00.000-08:00

some how..
i feel that there is just no more hope already..
i'm at a loss.. mislead by the reality of it..
your word like fire.. i wish it wasnt true.. but it did..
the sms u sent me.. it couldnt b wrong..
guess that i'll just have to think bout wad i have done..

2009-12-16T00:34:00.000-08:00

another day has passed..
its seems all fruitile..
could you b too busy to reply me?? jus a msg?
having mix feelings..
confusing...
arh...
nevertheless..
i'm been waiting for you..
all i ever wanted was just to love you..
i miss you~

2009-12-14T09:54:00.000-08:00

i finally take out my first step to msg you..
perhaps its my frans?? that encourage me.. (thx alot guys^^)
at first i was lost for words..
but as we msg along.. the feelings jus came back to me..
wad used to be..
i'm so contended that u could still reply my msg..
i was v happy that you have forgiven me..
bt 1 msg that shoot me hard was that..
after the incident.. i have no more feelings for you le..
when i saw this msg.. my heart jus broke into smithereens..
nw putting it back to 1 piece seems to be very impossible..
as you said.. you have lost hope n faith in boys le..
from this i can tell that u were rejected real hard..
i feel sad.. cos i wouldnt wan to see you hurt..
i just wanted to see you smile.. everyday happy..
thats all i can ask for..
but now.. i just have to watch you from a corner..
i'm willing to wait for you..
no matter how long you're going to heal your wounds..
i just wanted to let you noe that...
no matter wad happens.. i still love you..
i miss you deeply..

2009-12-13T21:12:00.000-08:00

an incident past my mind ytd..
after recallin wad has happen..
i feel so disappointed in myself..
i couldnt face you..
i tried to smile at you..
bt the moment that you look at me, you just turned away..
i noe the whole started by me...
even though u have forgiven me.. after so long..
i still couldnt face you..
those phone calls.. those msg that we sent to each other..
your smiles.. your laughter..
i still can vividly remember it all in my mind..
your phone no is still inside my phone..
a msg is all i need..
bt then.. some how.. i just cnt find the courage..
as i noe i have let you down.. and jus couldnt face you..
the moment i tried to msg you.. my hands jus stop moving..
bt now.. you couldnt have seen this post..
jus wanted to let you know that i miss you v much..
and i wanted to tell you that i still love you..

2009-12-05T10:42:00.000-08:00

mon n tues were final exams.. mangae to pull it off..
tues straight after exam go andrea his mum there to reborn n dye hair..
was disturbing each other to eat away the time..
super happy with my hair^^

fri went to class bbq..
prepared fried rice n bee hoon with jeff, yi ren, jocelyn..
cook till 4+ n wee ping came..
then cab down to east coast the pit..
start to play n then i was 'thrown' into the sea..
came up after that..
body start to itch.. omg!!
then faster cab home to take a shower then wait for my grandma..
cab down to east coast agn as she was going to wedding at clarke quay..
so shun bian dropped off..
then start to bbq n drink..
play the stupid game..
punishment is to sabotage each other..
made stupid drink lyk..
satay sauce + chili sauce + coke + 7 UP..
LOL!!
suay suay loser drink xDD
then bbq n eat till 11+
start to drink liao..
drink n eat n was getting a little tipsy..
drink till 1.30 then cab home..
almost puke in the taxi..
gt home n bath n puke all out..
went to slp with a giddy head.. LOL

morning went to soccer training..
nth much..
having headache during the training..
lol..
went home after that jiu slp le..
so tired..
woke up n went for work..
nth much actually..

2009-11-25T03:25:00.000-08:00

todae was tiring..
woke up at 12.. bath n ate lunch..
then cabbed down to kemganban CC..
meet up with alvin n cy for bball..
we started to play from 2 - 6.30
then sun was damn scorching..
then gt 4 navy guys come.. we decided to play a friendly match..
turn out it was nt friendly at all..
cos i accidently hit alvin n one of the guys..
opps =X
play 4 match with them..
then damn tired..
jiu rdm shoot..
came a bunch of ite ppl..
so noob!!
then jiu went home cos i noe that they are going to lend the bball n play..
so zao first =P
took 67 home with alvin..
dnt noe if i should slp early or nt..
skool starting at 9 tml..
ciao people!! =)

2009-11-24T05:41:00.000-08:00

todae damn tired..
NB gt insomnia..
FUCK IT LA..
ytd actually v tired de..
11+ should b in bed sleeping..
in the end turn n flip n toss in the bed till 4+ am..
then in the end 6 jiu wake up liao..
NABEI.. FUCK LA..
sua then better dnt slp..
wait for time to pass..
go n bath n called sheena wake up !!
she realli lyk a pig lo ><
then go n meet andrea at bedok..
bounce to skool..
a v good idea as we're able to sit down..
actually i cn slp de.. due to the insomnia.. ~.~
reach skool is lyk walking zombie le..
hyper abit then jiu damn tired..
then go meet cheng yang n alvin ard 2 at tamp safra for pool...
meet 2 new frans, they were merlynda n (opps i 4gt the name liao><)
they were 2 funny girls..
i dare to say that merlynda was cute.. pretty sure of it!!
then pool till 3+
went to mind cafe below to slack..
order tandoori chicken rice and apple crumble..
the food was still ok..
then play board games n ended ard 5..
soon the girls gtg then we zao also..
took 67 with the boys home..
reach home was supper tired..
dinner was nt much of a appetite..
ate little n soon i found my self v drowzy..
headed to bed n slp till nw..
omg.. something is wrong with my body..
hais.. pretty sure i was going to fall sick liao =(
kk ciaos ppl =)

2009-11-23T04:47:00.001-08:00

well.. todae was still ok for me at least..
did nt go gym..
bt went to play bball with andrea, chin cher, gavin, evan n zhao hui...
played in the shower..
so much fun.. so many laughter..
then we started to tok bout planning for their chalet..
it's gonna b on the 7-9 dec =)
after that slack awhile n go eat..
then went to marine parade library there to study...
in the end also nvr study..
over there was more lyk sleeping for me..
so comfortable...
then ard 6+ jiu went home..
tml there's skool..
so sian.. somemore its starting at 9..
omg thats freaking early..
kk..
continuing to rot liao..
bbuai ppl =)

2009-11-21T09:24:00.000-08:00

ytd did nth at all..
i shall say i'm rotting most of my time at home..
rot whole day..
somemore the stupid rain is making me sick =(
rot till 5 then decide to go gym..
it's time that i should train up..
haha..
gym n gym till 7..
so long nvr do liao..
muscle ache here n there =X
went home after that n start to rot agn..

todae woke up at 9..
cos having soccer match with anderson ltr..
prepare n eat at 511..
meet up with jayson to buy drinks..
then jiu bused to the mango field..
saw a match going on..
then the anderson came..
it's jus a few 14 yr old boys..
n some more its only 8 ppl..
nbm drop me, zs, ah ken, ah mao there..
play n score a 6-2..
blame me for being to lazy to move bout =P
although did some nice save..
bt seriously need to train more =)
my arms is still sore-ing from the gym..
LOL..
went home then bath n eat..
jiu wait for time to pass..
found out ltr that i was realli realli damn tired..
took a short nap..
woke up n prepared down to work..
todae was still alright =)
go home after that n rested..
arms is still sore-ing..
mon to thur gym with zs =)
shall train n shape up my body =)

2009-11-19T04:57:00.000-08:00

morning wake up at 5.30..
prepared n waited time to pass n went to meet andrea at enous, 6.30
waited for him.. as he 4gt to took his chicken feet ~.~
7 then trained to skool..
reach skool.. settle down n change out to chef U..
kitchen lights were trip..
so had to wait for teacher to settle it..
wait n finally we're in..
had a briefing at first..
then the test start..
3 course in 5hrs time.. including washing..
so first off started with my cameral custard..
as it had to chilled..
bt i over cook the custard.. as it was turining into scramble eggs ~.~
re-try n i pass.. =)
nxt move on to my veg for main course..
cut n make sure all the veg is uniformly cut =)
did my reduction..
as i was busy with my things.. totally 4gt bout my white wine reduction..
burned for 4 times ~.~
then sua do reduction n REALLI WATCH OVER IT ><
nxt move on to my salad..
do lemon vinegrette..
v nice..
then all put in chiller to chill..
nxt move to my chicken n fish..
butterfly the chicken breast..
pan fried n let it cook in oven..
move on to my sea bass..
filleted it n was damn nice..
totally no wastage.. ^^^^
wash clean n set aside..
do potato croquette..
took out my salad n start to mix the vinegrette into it..
potion it on salad plate..
put tomatoes n cut the chicken cubes n put over the salad..
appertizer done..
move on to my cameral custard..
remove from chiller n remove it from remikins..
dessert beautifully done also^^^^
move on to my main course..
finally i cn control 4 stove at once ^^^^
blanching, saute-ing, pan-frying, deep frying..
b4 that almost 4gt to do my lemon buerre blanc (butter sauce)
finish it n set aside..
then start to do my main course..
pan-fry sea bass with lemon buerre blanc, deep fried potato, n saute garden veg..
another beautifully done also ^^^^
present it to my CA n she said was v good..
super happy n relief to hear that..
she told me to kip it up.. mus have more confidence in urself..
gaga-ing the whole day..
clean up n went home..
was still raining T.T
trained n bus home..
reach home n start to fb =)
so long nvr on liao =P
then dinner time.. ask to go down to buy food ~.~
brought n went home makan =)
eat n rot liao..
nth much to do..
somemore tml no skool.. ^^^^
GYM anyone??
n bloody shyt i 4gt to take the photos ~.~
hahas.. thats all for todae =)

camarel custard n poach pear =)

gratin slamon =)

2009-11-18T06:32:00.000-08:00

hmm.. shall start from mon..
went for chalet of ex class mates..
started raining when i gt there after my skool ends..
had super lots of fun..
at first we stared to bbq ard 6+??
then cos of me the fire nt strong n we only had to bbq ard 8+..
then joke n laugh ard..
slack till ard 11 then went home with sabrina..
send her home then go home slp le..

tues morning was abit tiring..
due to the fact that i drank + so late slp..
hmm..
went to cook for the ceo function..
learn new stuff n experience..
then after which the whole thing end jiu rush bath home..
bathed n prepared n cabbed down to chalet..
had fun this time.. MORE FUN..
at first it started okok..
soon it started to rain..
luckily cheng yang brought tentage..
tied it with nylon string..
hang over our pit..
soon the rain was getting bigger n bigger..
the other pits were empty except for us who was bbq in the rain..
so much fun n laughter..
all the other pits open their door n look at us..
sibei funny sia..
hmm.. rain starting to stop n bbq was more fun..
started to cook all the stuff as we were checking out nxt morning..
then the pit beside us cook something for us..
in return we cook something for them..
then i was kana disao as 'WU ZUN'
LOL~
then yan kai was lyk hinting everybody..
cos i was the only 1 going over n stuff lyk that..
anyways.. bbq all stuff n cabbed with jason home..
bring more money nxt time.. no more free ride liao..
then after which jiu slp liao..

todae wake up n meet andrea..
meet at bedok n i go make my atm card..
then we go market buy our ingredient..
spent ard 30+
saw sir edwin there buying stuff..
then settle down with our stuff n went andrea hse
cook n cook for his sis n bro to eat..
gavin join us then i go bath..
then went to dnt noe where to gt gavin itouch..
went to pennisula to gt andrea stuff for his date..
hmm.. went suntec after that to look for more stuff..
so tempting to buy sia..
holi n work n save = SHOPPING HERE I COME!!
hahas..
then soon we went off as i wasnt feeling v well..
bus-ed home n went to 511 to settle my dinner..
after that went home..
tml phase test for 3 course..
so excited, yet no confidence..
hais..
buck up buck up..
shall try my very best..
n i miss my meteor shower!! @#%^@%&@$%
nbm.. wonder when is the nxt 1??
alrights..
nites n good luck guys =)

2009-11-10T06:08:00.003-08:00

hmm.. its been so long since i last touch this..
dnt noe y my firefox is starting to lag agn.. =.=
ytd has been a tiring day for me..
it's all down to personal feelings..
mayb it's all down to me..
my arrogant.. my selfishness..
mayb thats y u all dnt respect me..
i noe..
bt then y bring personal feeling into the kitchen??
i mean.. its lyk fuck la..
no body listening to me..
hais..
i couldnt do anything bout it..
i was trying to make the ship sail only..
without u guys the ship would definitely sink..
yes.. i noe i'm nt firm..
letting u step over my head..
doesnt matter if u do that..
i jus wanna see u all excel..
even there's anything wrong..
u guys wont get it..
its all down to me.. breaking my neck..
so pekcek the feeling..
couldnt even speak that infront of u guys..
so helpless..
bt over all..
i was glad that u all think bout it..
i need u guys tgt so that we can sail the ship tgt..
nt as an individual..
todae i was happy..
atleast u all started to listen to me..
this is wad i wan to see..
although i'm trying to keep it lyk that.. i need u guys..
if nt the ship would once sink agn..
did reflect alot after wad has been said..
ya.. i have a long way to go..
if i ever wanted to go further.. i need to change my attidute..

its kinda hard to let go of someone that u realli lyk.. or even love..
u might afraid to even end up losing up the person..
but.. its nt up to u to decide..
its fate that shall decide it..
mayb sometime is taking a step back is the key??
or even u have to back out in it..
its so hard.. so unfair..
bt i jus wanna see that u are happy..
happy with wad u are doing.. happy with who u are with..
its so hard to let go..

2009-11-02T05:15:00.002-08:00

hmm.. todae has been appointed as the exec chef..
was super dnt lyk it..
hmm.. started off as abit chaotic..
no body was listen to me n wee ping..
hmm.. at that point that i noe it's nt going to b sucessful..
soon after that was seperating into groups..
did nt went well for me too..
had prepare them to do misen place..
was super unorganized..
operation start..
at first was slow.. bt smoothly as time goes..
end of operation..
sales were good..
hmm..
did debrief..
after that rain n rain n rain..
went to report to mdm then go to canteen to slack..
waited for rain to stop b4 going home..
trained home n eat..
did nth much..

y i'm so low on my confidence??
y i'm so soft n half hearted??
i realli did have to change the way i'm..
to bring out the new me to everyone..
time shall prove it..
n we shall see =)

2009-10-24T10:15:00.000-07:00

todae morning went to eco energy saving thing..
so bored..
went home ard 1??
reach home n ate lunch..
surf net then went to slp..
woke up at 6 n found was late for work..
prepared n rush down..
todae was still ok..went home ard 12+..

25/10
skool started at 8..
did choux paste n cookie..
whole practical ended ard 11??
went to canteen n slack..
changed n waited for time to pass..
ard 2 then left for mushroom farm..
was quite nice..
went home ard 4?
then jiu rest n went down to work..
went home ard 12 then hit the bed..

HAPPY BELATED 17TH BIRTHDAE STEPHAINE
HAPPY BELATED 17 BIRTHDAE LUCAS TAN

i miss u~

2009-10-22T07:49:00.000-07:00

todae as usual..
jus lyk ytd.. nth much..
went to tamp popular to get a file..
cos my papers is turning into salted veg le..
after which went to tamp for dinner..
eaten steamboat with my father fran till 9+
the uncle send us home =)
then after which jiu went home le..
nth much todae.. =)

2009-10-21T07:12:00.000-07:00

todae work up as usual..
went to skool..
prepared for amber..
operation start.. halfway did stock..
man i'm getting good at doing it..
operation ended ard 3+??
then slack in skool..
4+ then went home..
reach home then rest awhile..
go work till 7+ then went to inter to meet my mum for dinner..
eat $47 then went to NTUC to brought my deo n face wash..
ard 9+ jiu went home le..

cnt forget u~ i jus miss u~

2009-10-20T06:59:00.000-07:00

today lessons was dry.. kip falling alseep in class..
although i had break in between.. still fall asleep..
serioulsy.. after a scolding from my CA..
i seriously need to adjust my sleeping time..
aftermath > home > dinner at tamp 137 (fish head steamboat) > home
need to rush up the project that i owe my CA..
kk.. gtg slp le..
nites guys..

2009-10-16T10:12:00.000-07:00

hmm.. where should i start??
skool started this week..
MPC as usual.. was realli dry..
amber.. was still ok la..
dnt noe wad to post.. jus know my blog is rotting le..

i wonder why it has to turn out this way..
all this moment that i'm been waiting for..
y wont u jus acknowledge my feelings for u??
isit very hard for u to do so??
cnt u see that i'm always been there for u??
我还是放不下你。你是我的一切。
这种感觉时中还是放不下来。
我还是喜欢这你。

2009-09-28T10:16:00.000-07:00

21/09 - 27/09
HILTON F1 WORK WAS FUN..
meet lots of people, gain lot of experience.. n all i cn say is that i'm prepared for IA le..
it was tiring as the F1 drew closer n closer.. did OT..
hmm.. overall my pays was $400+?? bt the pay is going to gt 1 month later T.T
n sorry bout the push on SUN chin cher..

28/09
woke up ard 12?
prepared n went down to accompany fran go interview..
bt went to bugis to makan first.. walk walk ard then pei her to city hall find her fran..
i walk off le..
called jian hao, saying that they were going to bugis.. walk ard raffles city..
the clothes there were so nice.. damn tempting to buy bt were a little too ex??
trained back to bugis..
brought a chequred top form Cotton On.. $20 =)
then waited for them..
reach about 3?
went to sim lim square to look for wei jie the headset?
walk ard aimlessly with leon, jian hao, wei jie, n his 2 fran..
he brought his new headset while i brought my ear piece for $19.90..
the colour so nice la.. bt i was looking for lime green..
dnt have then jiu left with metallic pink n blue..
so freaking nice la.. ended up with blue instead..
aft that trained n bused home..
settle down n eat dinner..
all i cn say is i finally have a break liao..

2009-09-17T10:15:00.000-07:00

todae was still ok..
woke up in the morning..
basically, skool was abit sian..
nw holiday more sian..
cos everyone gt their own activities..
then since the salmon competition is cancel..
which is a big impact for me, as me n syafiq were preparing very hard for it..
then when my CA msg me bout it being cancel,
i was damn hell shag..
then i'm nw at home rotting..
someone pls ask me out~
jiu bath n lunched at home..
prepare n went down to skool..
then reach skool go SC rm discuss bout the banner thingy for the children cancer foundation.
everyone was thinking hard for the slogan for then banner.
think till ard3+??
Alvin called n ask for K..
agreed then went back home? since in the rm nth much to do?
trained home n change jiu went to meet him..
had mac mega tgt n waited for Zhao Shing to come..
then went to CC there to sing our heart out..
damn nice as it dis-stress me =)
aft which went to 511 eat.. slack while waited for my mother to knock off..
reach home ard 12.30??
bath n here.. feeling sick also ~.~

HAPPY BELATED 17th BIRTHDAE MING HUI
HAPPY BIRTHDAE SOON ZHAO HUI!!

the feeling...
its coming back to me again..
ARH!! i just hate it..
the feeling of emptiness n loneliness..
it's so scary..
with the competition gone,
i'm lyk getting no where already...
there's no motivation, to get me going..
and lifeskill project is due-ing after the holidays..
still waiting for Yong Wang for the organisation to give us task..
tsktsk..
such a complicated and messy life i'm leading..
its sucks totally..
i wish that i could take a break..

2009-09-10T08:02:00.000-07:00

todae was my bdae..
early in the morning till evening was rotting at home..
super bored..
after which ard 6? jason, sen, lucas come my blk..
went to 85 to packet..
thought they mayb heading for soccer.. then end up i went home..
i'm sure they were up to something..
eat at home.. slack awhile..
went down n kana water bomb..
LOL.. was freezing..
cut cake n play some more water bomb..
aft which play blk catching..
play till tired n then play uno.
aft that some went off then some stay n slack..
ard 10 plus went home..
realli appreciate it alot.. love u guys.. althought some cnt go..
hahas..

2009-09-05T09:40:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAE JASON TAN!!
hahas..
ytd was v fun when hanging out with the rest at vivo..
was kana thrown into the wading pool by birthdae boy as it was his wish =P
i kana 3 times while he kana 2..
LOL..
so went home in drench clothing..
nt gonna upload any photo n pic as it was so embarrassing =P
reach home ard 12 n hit the bed..

todae morning went to soccer training..
tio sun burn agn.. this time is the face..
went home ard 12 n eaten lunch..
facebook bout ytd happenings..
went to take a nap till 5..
prepared n went down to work le..
then reach home ard 12.30..
bath n here blogging ;D

2009-08-23T08:51:00.000-07:00

these few days was quite dead..
has been down on my luck..
getting f*** out of the class for nothing..
i quit my job at my uncle there..
so ya..
working at bedok 511..
sian sia... these few days realli rot..

to - & passerby
i noe u concern bout me..
bt then.. then thing is, passerby, have u try living as me in my life??
yes i agree wif u that they giv me money to spent..
bt then u spent the money n they nvr ask hw u spend it??
they jus giv u the cold shoulder..
n i hope u cn put u in my shoes b4 saying out anything..

2009-08-14T08:09:00.000-07:00

went to skool as normal..
n nobody msg me bout the timing..
it was suppose to start at 10.30..
bt no1 msg me bout it..
reach at 8.30..
then slack ard..
did pasrty..
the end product was nice..

had sleepless nite every now n then..
at the same time having headache..
this sucks..
now my head is spinning lyk crazy..
could it b the spleepless nite that i having?
or is it jus stress that is causing it?
arh.. dnt have the energy to think bout it..
proj is due-in in a week's time..
havin to do the bazaar also..
so many things in hand and i couldnt handle well..
i feel so weak, so useless..
tml soing off to do YMCA at chinatown..
dnt noe if cn sleep tonite?
or going to flip n toss in my beds lyk the nites i have?
i shall try catch some sleep as it's going to b a long day for me..

no matter how long time have pass, i still cnt 4gt bout u..

2009-08-11T10:24:00.000-07:00

hais.. headache in the middle of the night..
and it's 1.24am..
right nw.. i really hit the breaking point of my life..
trapped in my own family proj, work, frans, skool, all sorts of stuff!
all i can say is that..
no matter hw much the effort i put in my work, or hw good my result turns out,
u never even see it, rather than saying it..
i dnt need to tell u wad i'm doing everyday,
u can ask me.. jus a word will do, n i'll noe that u are concern bout me..
right nw.. i dnt even feel anything from u..
wad family love.. i dnt believe in it anymore..
this place is shit.. i cnt realli take it anymore!
the feeling, it's starting to bug me now and then..
i dnt realli noe wad this place is anymore..
i dnt realli noe this place anymore..
it's doesnt feel lyk home to me..
i had to rush skool proj.. till late in the nite.. and all u cn do is to ask me to shut my com n get to slp, where as i need to push up my proj the next day..
nw for my little sis or bro.. if u need anything from me, jus say.. n nt took it without permission..
u noe how it's feel like ur things taken away without permission?
suck rite?? so better stop doing that already..
as for my bro, somehow or wad la.. i noe u gt stead nw, bt then no need always M.I.A at home?
u need pei her i cn understand.. bt then family is the most important ok?
hais.. skool proj is pilling up infront of me n i cnt seem to get anythings done yet..
arh!! i need a break, i need to breathe.. i need space for my own thinking..
nt every proj u let me b leader cn?
i nt superman or wad so eva.. i cnt do that much things at 1 time u noe..
it's lyk i b the group leader for 4 proj straight n the feeling, IT SUCKS OK!!
arh!! family prob.. it's nt lyk 1 or 2 times.. it's almost a daily basics for me..
to get scolding for nothing? wad the hell sia..
i'm nt the 1 that usually hang out wif the wrong groups of fran.. i choose them..
unlike my bro.. u see wad his group of frans are.. then u tell me wad time i should come back home.. there's nothing wrong havin barberque into late nite.. i mean most teenagers would do it?
bt then i'm ur son.. n i dnt have that little respect from my parents..
i feel so dissapointed sia..
no word of encouragment,no word of concern, all i heard from u is questioning.. where i go? go there for wad? BULLSHIT!!
i hate this feeling!! i realli hate it lo.. i cnt stand it anymore..
and this home is nt wad i realli wanted..
it's lyk a empty house, with people nia.. no warmth, no nothing!
i realli hate it lo.. IT SUCKS!
y dnt u try to b in my shoes n see hw i feel?
if lyk this rite, i rather stay out till late night then come back..
so havin less of ur scolding, questioning, wadeva u wan to say..
all i noe that no matter hw much effort i put in,
hard work i try in my work,
all u cn see is nth.. totally nothing from me..
i hate u!!
it's nw 1.50am n i was wondering if i still cn go to slp or nt..
headache is killin me..

2009-08-01T22:56:00.000-07:00

YESTERDAY
went to soccer training with my brothers, hahas.. so long nvr see u guys le..
meet up wif jason at MCP supermarket..
then buy water n bused to T.P
there meet up wif them n then started to play for awhile..
then the training comes..
IT'S DEFINETLY NT A EASY JOB BEING A GK..
v harsh training wif jason..
then aft which train till 3+
went off wif jason, yong ding, yan kai, zhao xing, qing hui, wei shen..
eat at sen ex-hse there.. then rush home to bath n went down to work le..

TODAE
woke up at 7.50..
was late for training at bedok stadium..
started by Zhu telling me to run for 30 min..
jog/walk 8 rounds ard the stadium..
hahas..
rest n jog..
then ard 10 went off wif zhong..
will blog more ltr..
going doing to work le..

alright guys.. back from work..
when i was working, i was thinking of a qns..
did my parents ever ask me wad i actually want??
and the answer is no..
come to think of it, i did feel realli sad bout it..
so ya.. it did spoilt my mood for the day..
cos my parents did ask my bro n sis bout it.. n they nvr ask me..
was so freaking shag lor..
didnt hav the mind to do things..
n sorry for my group members..
i did nt do my job well as a group leader..
i feel that i'm the prob for my team.. as i did nt organise well for my team..
didnt have time to go out wif them to do the proj..
as it's only 3 weeks till deadline..
i feel so sad.. so stupid.. so worthless..
A USELESS PERSON!!
cnt even do a proper job well..
i'm nothing.. just a burden..
a burden that will jus sink the ship which is taking the rest of the crews who thinks there is hope for them..
from nw..
kevin chew's heart is dead le..

2009-07-31T07:40:00.000-07:00

I'M NT THAT KIND OF PERSON THAT IS JUDGE BY IT'S COVER..
WAD U MAY SEE ON THE OUTSIDE DOESNT MEAN THAT WHAT IS ME...
U DO NT UNDERSTAND ME.. HU ARE U TO JUDGE ME!!
SO FUCKING GET LOST.. THE FURTHER THE BETTER..
I DNT EVEN NEED U IN THE FIRST PLACE AT ALL..
IT'S WAS ME MAKING A WRONG JUDGEMENT FIRST!!
SO FOOLISH OF ME!!

2009-07-29T05:25:00.000-07:00

these few days very tired..
think going to fall sick soon..
too much things in hand..
n the fucking printer cnt work..
LOL..
too stress n tired.. haiz..
wont be blogging for the nxt few days.. or even weeks..
bye ppl =D

2009-07-19T07:38:00.000-07:00

todae went to meet meet andrea, chin cher n do our proj..
went to meet them at enous at 1.30.. bt i was late.. psps..
trained to city hall n wanted to go ceni to do it bt andrea suggested to change our venue to bugis..
went there n hav our lunch.. walk n walk to find a photo shop to print the survey..
bt couldnt find 1..
so walk n walk to andrea mother salon there to hav his hair cut.. hahas
then wanted to start on our discussion de..
bt my uncle suddenly called..
so rush down n things turn out ugly...

FUCK UP!! I DNT WAN TO HAVE THIS KIND OF LIFE..
I'M SICK N TIRED OF IT ALREADY..
I LOSE MY FREEDOM.. N I'M NT UR TOY OK!!
I'M NT UR KIND OF TOY U CN VENT UR ANGER ON!!
I WANT WAD OTHER NORMAL TEENAGER WOULD HAVE..
TO B ABLE TO GO OUT ON WEEKENDS TO HANG OUT WIF FRAN..
I WAN MY FREEDOM!!
N I DNT NEED U FUCKING HELL CONTROL MY LIFE!!
SO ALL I WAN TO SAY IS I WAN MY FREEDOM BACK!!

2009-07-17T19:52:00.000-07:00

Ytd was quite a long dae.. hahas..
went to skool ard 8.. gt to hav some demo.. the demo is 6 salads!! OMG!!
lol.. aft demo finish is PE.. LOL.. prespire quite alot..
then actually practical is 2 pm.. bt dnt noe which fagot say it's 1.30!!
rush to hav a quick shower n changed..
went into kitchen n set up everything..
did salads.. LOL.. the RAW TASTE OF IT IS SO DISGUSTING!!
then it ended ard 5+??
quickly rush back home n changed out..
cabbed down to pasir ris de sen hse.. lol...
it's been such a long time since i meet them..
i miss u guys!!
eat n chatted all sort of things..
chatted n soon it was 11.30..
then we all cleared up n cabbed home.. went to 511 to grab some bite b4 going hm..
slp ard 1.30?

todae
woke up ard 10.30..
bathed n here bloggin..
shall blog more aft my work..
hahas.. =)

back from work...
actually hor.. todae nth much lar...
was quite a boring dae for me..
going to slp soon..
tml going to do survey wif frans..
hahas...

2009-07-14T06:32:00.000-07:00

todae woke up early.. bt was late when meeting andrea, chin cher, zhao hui..
hahas.. dnt noe y bt i still woke up early leh..
hmm.. trained to skool n headed straight to class..
lessons was ok.. jus that we need to rush up on our proj..
DAMN DIFF LOR.. N BLOODY HELL ASK ME B LEADER..
nbm.. watch kitchen nightmare.. was damn funny as gordon ramsay kip saying FUCK bt it was cencored lar.. LOL~
then aft which no more lessons le..
went home straight n had lunch.. then suddely damn sleepy n went to take a nap..
slept from 2-7.. lol.. dnt noe if i cn slp well ltr or nt..
went to 85 to hav dinner.. ate tian ji zhou n durian.. was nt bad..
aft which went home n started to do my proj..
when i stare at the paper, was damn lost lar..
nt v sure of how to do it.. all mixed up already..
n yes.. tml we are serving real customers.. hmm.. WE WILL DO IT GUYS~

lost in my world.. my own thoughts.. seriously.. i need u~

2009-07-13T08:00:00.001-07:00

todae damn tired.. slp at ard 2.30.. aft rushing my BAZAAR thingy..
then go skool n past it to sharon during lunch..
skool was draggy todae.. n my eyes was damn small todae..
hahas.. during life skill kip KL my CA..
super funny.. was ROFLMAO!!
hahas.. then aft that went hm.. then slack lor..
sharon told me still nd to do pricing for the BAZAAR..
then went down to NTUC n Seng Song to check out the pricing for the stuff to sell..
hahas. aft which went home n slack agn..
WHO NOE HW TO DOWNLOAD MTV OR MOVIE INTO MP4 PLS LEAVE A TAG..
REALLI NEED IT XP

thats all for todae..

2009-07-12T10:58:00.000-07:00

wah.. this week, or rather these few days.. been pushin myself to the limits..
work, study, work, study.. i dnt noe if i'm still able to take it or nt??
it's nw 2:03am.. usually this time i would b alseep in my bed already..
bt nw here am i, rushing my BAZAAR poster n resume letter..
wad a busy n tiring life i'm leading..
hw i wish i was able to have a busy life bt nt a tiring 1..
nw back rushing my BAZAAR poster..
bye guys~ =O

2009-07-04T08:34:00.000-07:00

THUR
went to bugis wif kevin.. watch transformer 2.. was super nice.. hahas.. aft which went shopping.. brought a wallet, n a buckle belt n earring.. hahas.. was fun.. aft which ard 7 trained back to bedok for dinner b4 i go hm..

FRI
went to work as usual.. was kinda busy ytd.. n nth much

TODAE
HAPPY 3RD MONTH CHRISTY BABY.. hahas.. went to work as usual.. was super tired.. mayb sleeping early todae.. thats' all for nw..
will update more if any interesting thing happen ;D

2009-07-01T08:21:00.000-07:00

todae i recieve a shocking news..
the competition that i going in oct..
then dnt accept individual..
was damn sad when i heard the news..
was super sad when i couldnt go for the individuals..

2009-06-30T09:03:00.000-07:00

got my result..

A.S.D - A
S.S.S - B
M.C.P - B
I.K.P - B

overall my GPA is 3.2
was actually aiming for a 3.8..
saded that i did nt get my ideal result..
bt nvm.. wad is past is past..
let bygones be bygones..
n i will strive hard to get wad i wan!! =D

2009-06-24T07:08:00.000-07:00

todae went shopping wif mum.. at TAKA.. brought a black long sleeve for $52..
aft which walk ard to see if there's any vest?? went to HMV n nth..
so trained down to bugis street to check it out.. did found 2 that 1 one.. hahas..
spend $65 on 2 vest, 1 sliver tie, n 1 tee-shirt.. cheap neh..
headed to tamp mall for our dinner.. then walk walk n saw andrea family.. hahas..
aft which continue to walk ard then go home le.. that's all for todae..
my legs are tired from all those walking.. =3

2009-06-18T08:09:00.000-07:00

woke up ard 7.30.. prepare n train-ed to skool. reach there bout 9.15.. went into the rm n start to move everything out.. wipe n clean the whole room.. wah.. todae time fly v fast.. n soon it was lunch time.. eaten KFC n went back to work.. moved everything in n was done by 2.30.. settle down n prepare to do the thing for the notice boresd..
n something cropped up..
I WAS SUPER PISSED OFF!!!
then slack in the rm till 5+.. train-ed down to tamp 1 to find father n eat our dinner.. eat at food court n the food there was ex lor.. spend ard $40+..
aft which bused hm n rot liao..

2009-06-17T06:46:00.001-07:00

BLAZE CAMP ROCKS!!!
love the trainers there.. love the ppl there.. N I LOVE THE DANCE FLOOR... dance the whole nite.. sweat alot.. hahas.. meet lots of new frans.. althought it is tiring n smelly.. bt was worth the time going.. super fun lor.. xD
LOVE BLAZE CAMP!!!

2009-06-10T20:10:00.000-07:00

YESTERDAE: 10/06

ytd went to do charity at jurong east... organised by YMCA... i started bout 1.30 n ended bout 5.30?? was long hours as was asking ppl to donate.. nxt time, when u see ppl on the street ask u to donate, pls do nt hasitate to do it.. nt much bt mayb a dollar will do.. it's realli a tought job n a tiring 1... hahas.. reach hm bout 7 n eat dinner.. nth to do le.. going to rot agn... ahahas..

TODAE

jus wake up at 10.30.. going down to meet zhao shing ltr ard 12 going to K.. aft which mayb going to IT show to meet my fran?? shall see hw first lor..
blog more ltr guys.. ;D

jus came back from market.. at 12 meet zhao xing at inter then went mac to eat as zhao shing havent eat yet.. took 15 min to wat then went X-GAMING.. played L4D n won.. hahas.. i killed 248 zombies.. 3 hunter.. 5 bomber.. 1 tank.. 3 witch.. 3 smoker.. hahas..
then headed to chai chee CC to sing de.. bt we're late by 1 step.. hais.. actually todae gt the mood to sing de.. hahas.. nbm.. went to TAMP 1 to meet up wif samson, andrea, jia xin, ming hui.. went walk walk n saw dorin n her stead.. then we all left n i trained down to suntec to c the PC show..
saw xuan wei n shi li... hahas.. xuan wei height is catching up to me le.. shi li is so tanned lor.. then saw some of my NP senior.. aft that go n buy a ear piece n went down to say bye to them.. aft which trained down to bedok to makan.. slack there till 11.30.. then went home n blog le..
that's all for todae.. too tired le guys.. nites.. ;D

2009-06-09T03:38:00.000-07:00

todae woke up bout 10.45.. bath n prepare to go down.. meet up wif the rest at mrt.. hahas.. played along in the train.. haha.. reach skool n waited outside demo rm.. waited for mdm to come down.. then went into the training kitchen n mdm told us bout our exam result.. all of us did well.. hahas.. then mdm mention something bout palau bugus n moninated waddy, lesley, waddy, n de yao.. when i heard my name was nt mention.. on the spot sian sia.. hais.. hu ask me to slack so much.. only myself to blame for it.. aft which was dismissed.. then go somewhere to slack b4 going hm to hav dinner...

jus nw went do to have a game of street soccer.. hahas.. was fun bt i think i strain my ankle le... tml doing charity donation at jurong east inter.. pls come n hlp to donate.. it's for charity...

i'm going to oversea for a competition.. i still cnt make up my mind.. should i go or nt??seriously... i'm nt too sure myself too... it's during otcober...

2009-06-06T08:13:00.000-07:00

YESTERDAE...

went out wif zhong, yan kai, irwin, yong ding, kai rui, linda, jun si, miss wong, jing hui, n nt to forget the birthdae girl which birthdae was todae.. (hop i didnt miss out any1) went to bedok inter at ard 5.15 n waited.. then saw linda, followed by rui n yong ding.. went to control station n meet up wif wendy n jun si.. LOL.. no body told me bout their wearing.. zzz was the only 1 wearing slipper.. the rest was lyk jeans n covered shoes?? arh... nvm.. went to meet up wif the rest at cineleisure n watch State Of Play... 1 word for it.. POLITICS.. it was all bout politics.. bt overall was nt bad.. rate bout 3/5.. after which went to ding tai feng to eat.. all eaten up to ard 180.. then went behind taka there to celebrate wendy birthdae.. hahas.. the cake was so filling lor.. as it was so sweet n little bit sourish.. bt nt bad.. haha.. after that irwin departed n we all trained back to inter.. then some of us slack at mac.. after which mum called n walk back home n rest le... took some pic bt decided nt to upload... hahas.. these are the pic we took ytd...

wendy's cake.. look yummy isn't it??

A group photo we took...

HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAE WENDY~

TODAE...

was normal.. went to work as usual... hahas.. reach hm ard 10.30 n rot le.. basically.. i'm rotting agn... hais.. realli nth to do at home liao... fk sia....

2009-06-04T08:28:00.000-07:00

todae as usual.. had our Main Course Preparation test.. wan kinda diff as it was set by sir gim.. haiz.. as the saying goes.. expect the unexpected.. was nt fully prepared for it.. hais.. bt nw is exam over le.. no point dwelling over it.. hahas.. was prepared to fail this M.C.P..

went to somerset to meet my laopo n her frans.. was late.. so ps... hahas.. went to buy movie tickets n watch at cathay.. watched Monsters VS Alien 3D.. was super lame de lor.. some more the 3D is lyk 2D??? hais.. waste of money...

went to take neo print n play arcade for awhile.. then jiu send her to mrt wiif her frans.. went home for dinner n ard 8.30 jason called for street soccer.. join them n played till 10.30.. then jiu went home n rested..

laopo.. i noe this is a tough period for us.. let's take it as our challange.. we cn over come this challage since our love for each other is so strong.. so n try nt to call me so much ok?? i dnt wan ur aunt to kpkb so much ok?? anything u wan tok to me cn pass to shu ting n she will pass it to me de ok??
i seriously miss u alot.. i love u...